The Crazy People Excerpt

She was still muttering, rummaging through the remainders of her last hallucination when I hollered "BINGO!" to the crowd of 25 or so, and she stopped to admonish me for being so brash. "Some people here take this game very seriously you know" she whispered, chuckling as she looked nervously about the room. "Whoops, my mistake" I told the number caller while I flushed to the bone. I'd made the mistake intentionally, but there was no reason not to add some dramatic color to my ruse. "You're right mom" I admitted; "Let's let the crazy people win. It'll make them feel better." She laughed and looked me square in the eye. "BINGO" she shouted, and then leaned toward me to whisper "yes let's". With a wink and a smile she collected her prize and settled in for a night of heavy competition, aware that her skeleton had been sprung from its heavily guarded closet at last. I despise bingo. I loved my mother. It was a fair trade. The term "The art of compromise" is a fallacy. It's a science.
This page appears in honor of my mother, and all the many things she was.

Little Engines Can Do Big Things

Again, for youngsters only. A reading of the Thomas and Friends book “Little Engines Can Do Big Things” for the little woman’s nephew Zane. Includes the little woman making noises as page turn prods. Delivered in my marvelous English accent, which only occasionally seems to be Scandinavian, but really isn’t.

Little Engine That Could

Unless you’re about 3 years of age, this will likely not be interesting to you. In fact, I’m not even sure yet if a 3 year old likes it. But here it is anyway. A reading of the book “The Little Engine That Could”, with page turn instructions for my wife’s nephew Zane.

Baby, You’re the One

A few people… ok maybe one person has wondered how I write verse; like what’s the process. Well Timmy… sometimes I have an earworm! (that’s a song in my head) and I write what fits in the song syllablalitily! Often the poem has nothing to do with the original song, mainly cuz I can’t [...]

For Those Poeseussed By Fear

One of my first attempts at verse. Could be one of my best though it’s a tad punny. Warming up for a post to come soon.

Poop Deck Ambiance

This is an unusual post, not meant to entertain but only as an intimate experience. Saturday afternoon I grilled a couple steaks, and recorded the sound from my deck as I hear it whenever I feel the need to contemplate my navel. Within the sound you’ll hear myself and the little woman, a wren [...]

The Red Cloak of Malevolence

A slight variation on an old classic.

Bilal and the Beanstalk

For a friend’s young son, a retake on a classic. Happy Birthday Rugrat.

Glass Valley

As Frank Zappa might have said, “A real nice place to raise your kids up…”

Marie

marie

Once upon a time I wrote and produced music. Oh, I wasn’t all that good at it, but it paid pretty well over a number of years. This particular piece was the first, a test of sorts, a gift to my ex wife. It was our wedding processional, written note by note, humming each [...]

The Great Book of Betty

The John and Martha Killerwhale Story